# Critical Sarcasm for the knees

# Old Ass Sudotask

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## Tip? What bullshit.

audio version

The whole concept of the tipping system is bullshit. If you get excellent service and want to tip, cool, but tips shouldn't be expected, and this should be obvious, but they should never be mandatory.

The tipping system is there to fuck with you.

Oh, I can order a burger... and it's only eight dollars, awesome!

Then at the end of the meal:

Oh right, I need to tip? 15%... er... uh... carry the one... ah fuck it, here's two dollars.

So now the eight dollar meal is suddenly 10 fucking dollars. Way too much for a burger. If the owners were more honest with their prices, they would post a sign saying something like, “Servers paid fair wages, tips not required” and simply charge $8.25 for that same fucking burger and be done with it.

So tipping is a problem. Well, just don't tip. Simple solution right? Well, it would be, but people are so damned indoctrinated to the concept of tipping that there is huge social pressure to just tip and be done with it.

But those poor waitresses work their ass off, the least you could do is give them a tip.

No dammit. If their employers paid them a fair wage, this wouldn't be an issue. Why are we responsible for their salary? We're just consumers, it's just not our problem.

Tipping is horrible, but they couldn't make it worse could they? Of course they can. They can make it mandatory. Avoid these businesses like the plague.

So yea, you and your associates have a meeting at a restaurant. When you get the bill, you see there is a 15% tip already included.

What the fuck? You organized this meeting, brought six fucking customers to this proprietor, and he has the fucking gall to charge you extra for bringing him business? What the fuck?

Perhaps just as annoying; when a restaurant says: “We do not accept tips.”

If someone wants to tip they should be able to. Some places will even punish employees for accepting tips. Why? Because some employees are assholes and will ask for tips when they shouldn't be? Then let a manager approve the tip. Just let us tip if we want to.

Oh, you don't trust your managers? Well, perhaps you should find a new management then.

I try not to tip. But the pressure can be immense sometimes. When everyone acts like you are an asshole, sometimes it's easier to just go along with society. Which is something we all should work on. The easier way is usually not the best way.

If your friends and family can't respect your philosophical and ethical concerns; fuck em.