# Critical Sarcasm for the knees

# Old Ass Sudotask

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## My partner... fuck you. That's not your partner.

Partner? Don't say partner, just tell me what the hell you're talking about.

Parter is a terrible word that seems to be used more and more as time goes on. It is especially terrible when it is referencing a girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other.

It is confusing and terrible that partner can relate to a sex life. Back when Glen Greenwald released the NSA documents, there was a lot of talk about his partner.

This was confusing considering that this was the journalist who released insanely sensitive information. When someone hears about his partner they would expect it to be a business partner. This, however, was not true. For whatever reason the media decided they need to talk about his homosexual lover, which for the most part, had nothing to do what so ever with the story at hand.

We need to go back to the days of keeping private life private. I miss the old don't ask don't tell mantra of the army. Not because it was a backhanded way of letting homosexuals into the Army, but because I don't want to know about your homo/hetro/bisexual life.

Now if someone says, My partner and I made an extra $100 working overtime today There is no way to tell what the hell is going on. Is that your skydiving partner where you give lessons? Is it your business partner? Is it your fellow dancers at the strip club? Is it your lover? A combination of these?

The emphasis on saying partner to cover up homo/bisexual status is silly. It is not much of an issue in this country, prejudice be damned, but we still don't need to hear about it.

Another increasingly annoying use of the word is for when two people are together (hetro or homo), they don't want to say girl/boyfriend, and they are not married. Seriously, we can just saying friend, or someone's name. We don't need to know the intimacy level, we just need to know what is being referenced.

Unfortunately, other methods people tend to be using are almost equally annoying, but for different reasons. Oh my dw is at work right now. or My dh is a lumberjack.. Lumberjacks are pretty fucking spiffy, but holy shit, who the hell says dear husband/wife? Type like you speak, and don't speak like an idiot.

I do believe I've rambled on enough about this. The partner thing has me really annoyed. When I heard Glenn Greenwald's partner was intercepted at an airport, I thought it was a business partner related to the NSA documents. Couldn't they just have used a better word for that situation? Anyway, comment below and teach me how to write.